The uncertain events in life hike in, as an unexpected guest when you are about to take off...(A post from my 2007 diaries...)
I was about to leave my home, heading for an unknown and entirely new destination and I heard the door knock. Ah! It's the unexpected guest.
Thinking alone at my current home, waiting for my friend to arrive I was wondering about the age-old amusing incident, when you have a plan to go out from home and suddenly an unexpected guest hikes in. Sometimes, life is like this, you plan something and something else happens, you surrender to life and take a decision and then life brings something/someone and you doubt your next move.
Lets take it the guest way only; there can be various situations, few like –
When you get ready to look your best for the party, which you don't feel like attending and suddenly an unexpected guest arrives. Consciously or unconsciously you feel happy about it, a little more relaxed, a little at more ease.
Vice-Versa to (a), sometimes we are thrilled for the outing plan and a guest arrives. The knock at the door is hated and the guest is treated as a spoilsport but then again you are forced to attend the unexpected and to your own surprise you end up loving it.
Now this one looks even more troublesome to me, sometimes when you have no plan, you feel sick of life, you want to run-away and as you reach for the door, someone knocks it. Again an unknown, outthought of guest is at the door, smiling the sparkling smile.
Has it ever happened to you?
May be yes. May be not. Ok, I think the (c) is really troublesome and its even a hurting situation. May be I am just taking time to express what this girl, you are going to read about has felt twice, once before and now quite recently. Many things have happened in her life in last 3 months, seems as if each single brain nerve of hers has thought of hundreds of things and has forced her to stress herself as much as she can!
Still I would say, I cant complaint about her because she is in a habit of thinking too much and may be she loves pondering on the mystery that life offers. It's all about the work life, the preferences, the trust or I believe loyalty is a more appropriate word. It's all about what she thought, what she did and how she managed. But then she has no complaints as she has learned to take the onus of her life but probably she lives with some regrets, which I truly want her to come over from. Amen!
Here, the person rushing out of the home (as referred in c) is a girl, ambitious, confident and dreamer who believes in chasing them hard. She is Strong, yes I am quite confident may be because she led her head rule over her heart. She isn't very quick in taking decisions, she cribs a lot when she dislikes something, she is used to of getting worried for the ill treatment to human genre, she is lively, she is fun, she is a kiddo and above all she is very candid and very normal.
Have I confused you a lot?
May be yes. May be not. But I would say, don't be confused. Be sure of what you think of her, because as such she cares a damn of this damn world. Actually, she does but then she consoles herself, she has learnt to make rules and to follow them. She has crossed the barriers, faced the hardships and took a decision, no matter what next?
Ok lets get back to out (c) state of incident. As I have introduced the girl, the reason she feels sick of life are varied, we can say sometime personal, sometimes professional, sometimes just an ongoing social situation, sometimes a friend or sometimes an acquaintance.
And now the guests, well they are again many. Sometimes friends, sometimes family, sometimes totally unknown, sometimes out thought of and god knows what?
Any guest arrives and she goes out of her mind, as in she starts thinking on the decision all over again, she lets the guest influence her mind so much that she doesn't remain sure of herself, her own take on her own life goes into discretion and scrutiny. This is not done and neither is this appreciated. She knows people love her but because of the mistrust of others she let them run away, she finds love, she follows her head and let the love move away, far away.
But while writing all this, I realize that she is not unaware of all this. She very well understands the destinations she missed, the paths she crossed, and those she visited in her life. Still she is traveling the journey called life.
Is she still hopeful of reaching the unattainable, to reach her world, the world of her imagination?
Like kids talk of a world with roads of chocolates, she dreams of a road without obstacles or thinks of peaceful ways to cross them, the child thinks of no school, she dreams no violence, child never miss mother to be a part of this world, she dreams of trust to be such a part. Kid always has at least a single friend for his or her company; she is still wondering will there be anyone with her on her bon voyage? Kid complaints, same she does but she isn't sure of the people she complaints to, she has a fear of mistrust, of misunderstood or mistook. Still she plans to carry a gadget, the one that will help her connect to her near ones, as she hates to be alone. That's a different story that she feels lonely and she fought alone. But what matters most is that, She is still hopeful. She is strong.
Hence, I am sure that she will face the guest, the unknown and uncertain. She will again have her doubts; she will face the difficulty in choosing the right people (mistrust has made her skeptical) but at last as always she is come over everything.
The guest will be either welcome or she will move away from the uncertain – now known, once again to one more unknown destination.
