This daughter's day I have a thought wandering across my mind. Alright I know these days were born considering the commercial viabilities but the day got me thinking! And I wondered, what if I had a daughter! About all these days around relationships, love, peace, environment - well the world would be a better place if we celebrate each day as such a special day.
When you ask Google, about Daughters Day in India it says, International Daughters Day on the fourth Sunday in September celebrates the girl child. The observance originated in India where, even today, some cultures see girl children as burdens. Guess what! We ever have a National Girl Child day! Girls after all are so so special that people who love them generously risk making six, seven and even 10 of them (thats the maximum I have witnessed) in the hope of a boy. Irony!
Being surrounded by my beautiful nieces and many women who intrigued me, instigated me, made me weak, I had an urge to write-down the thoughts that have been running through my mind.
If I had a daughter what would it be like, will I teach her empathy or I will let her cry. Would she be a fighter or the one with a victim cry.
I will make her aware of her abilities and her deserving rights. I wouldn't give her the lessons that allow others to decide your limits of suffice.
She would have a lesson to respect others with her head high. There isn't a charm in following the worldly regulations that guide a woman to reprise.
Don't worry, be strong. Do this and Do that, speak like this and hide like that, no that's not going to be the narrative.
If I had a daughter I would tell her, Don't worry be strong, You gonna make it through anyway. And only you can do it, so take charge and march on. It's your life, you know how you want to live it.
Do not shame anyone because you wouldn't appreciate being shamed. If I had a daughter I would tell her this instead of telling her to connect, indulge with people only if you need them or run away if you are in a fix. I would tell her to face it with a chin up and be enough to handle what life offers.
If I had a daughter, I would never tell her to do something or not do something because she is a girl. I would tell her the rights and wrongs and the pros and cons.
I would tell her to get married, stay married and make kids when she is ready and feels for it. If I had a daughter I would never tell her that this is what she is in the world for.
I would save her from this world so chaotic about a gender, the judgements, the protocols, the one sided demarcations and decorums. If I had a daughter I would tell her it's good to have her opinion, be candid and conscious. I feel that would make her conscientious and I would wish that for all the daughters.
I would recommend her spirituality that helps her keep calm and save her from the rituals that set her boundaries and sets her life on alarm. If I had a daughter I would ask her to be true to herself, follow, worship and live the rituals that add up to her days.
I know I am the conservative kinds. But I am not the feminist kinds, may be judgemental at times but I try to not judge every time.
If I had a daughter I would ask her to be strong as that is the only way to keep the deafening opinions away!
If I had a daughter I would tell her to learn self love, comfort herself before teaching her how to keep everyone pleased. No that would not mean to be self-centred or be selfish, that would mean making herself-suffice.
That would be about telling her to do things she totally feels for. That would mean to not make her happiness, her respect and her life dependent on others. Because this creates a lot of gap not just in the minds of daughters but even in the society at large.
If I had a daughter I would tell her to stand for good, speak for the right and keep the chin up without a fright. She would know unconditional love and the without benefits, so that she never judges and allows the benefit of doubt or trust. For this would keep her sane and positive all her life.
If I had a daughter she would be allowed to take risks with a promise to keep her back as she must not falter. This to empower her trust and save her from all breakage. I would wish her to be more mindful and less about minding your own business.
I will tell her to embrace challenges and not to succumb because she is a girl. I will explain to her the capabilities before the lesson of grabbing opportunities.
If I had a daughter she would be allowed to be her own. She would work, worship and wander as these are her rightful choices. She would only be guided on the part of right and wrong and she would be trusted with her choices as that's what a family should do.
She would be given the orientation rather than forcing the views. She would be raised with logic and not the worldly view!
Disclaimer: For all those who know me, who judge me and nudge me, this is just a piece of write-up that cropped in my mind after having several observations on how people define a world so differently to a female (read with gender based guidelines). Request you to kindly not link it to being feminist or not being a mom. The piece is an accumulation of thoughts that knocked my mind a hundred times while observing how our surroundings define the world differently to a girl child, a woman, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a daughter-in-law and even mothers.
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