Circle of Growth & Change!

I am a little lost….

For they have changed the roads I traveled!

I am a little lost….

For I can go back never!

I am a little happy….

Because I have saved some hope!

I am a little tense…..

For more loss of sense!

I am a little of me….

And a lot of me am lost for no better!

I am a little shy….

For I know there are no answers to my whys?

I am a lot more…..

But most of me am lost forever!

I am my Dad’s little girl……

What pity! I am a grown up what for that matter!

Change....The only Constant!!!

Change..........is the only thing constant. I am sure you know this but still I felt like writing about this. May be how and when I realised this made a difference to me. Anyways being a taurean..... I dont like changes at all. Being a true taurean I get adapted to them. What I was thinking is this......that no matter how much we are in love with things, with people, with circumstances.....they are ought to change......because thats the only constant. It might be a contradictory thing to say but it happens. And sometimes changes are expected ones but most of the times they are unexpected and sudden. But being so much into the routine life............no one prefers them......because we become used to of our scheduled mechanized life and suddenly the system need change, the technology (present life) becomes obsolete and presses us to move on...........leaving the existing one aside..........I dont have anything specific in my mind as of now but there had been many such instances that made me realise....that change is one thing which can happen anytime with anybody........so we should learn to adapt to them instead of panic. It can be the little one like change in plans of a meeting, change in holiday plans, movie of anything like that.........it can be change in the technology...........or system.........anything but most of the times.................its disturbing and even if it is not we take it that way................and later we realise the actual effect...................good or bad......!!!!!!
It happens naturally also............and sometimes by choice. I have seen people adapting themselves thinking that its for better but actually their innerself never agrees to that. Sometimes its about people......thats very complicated because its easy to adapt to new machines thats materialistic......... but change in people and change in circumstances need inner strength to cope with and overcome. Your brain says that things are changed and you need to move on with them but your heart doesnt allows so..........and thats when the conflict comes......but whatever is the case that will happen what is ought to.....and fighting with innerself and increasing troubles will cause harm to oneself only so the faster we understand and introspect the easier it becomes.......because when the change happens in our life we prefer not to discuss anyways it doesnt makes a difference to others because its us who are effected.....so introspection and understanding is the key to adaptation and then we know that Life moves on.........and the show must go on.......!!!!

Nothing is serious!!!!

Life a bed of roses. Having read a post by Ellen today morning, I have been wondering that Life is a bed of roses.

Did you say - not always??? Well it is indeed.

I liked saying that, as it leave me with a positive note. And otherwise also I hate myself for being negative at times when Life pushes me too much.
Life is a bed of roses. Only the color of roses keep changing. Remember, Roses are in white, pink, yellow, orange and red color. But don’t you miss the Black Rose. Similarly, life has got different colors and the situations & circumstances keep on giving it one and another shade thereafter. And then roses have horns too. That could be taken as a life’s decision to push one so hard that ultimately one bleeds.

I remember a brief conversation here, when I had asked about the well being of a friend and since its so recent, that my thoughts flew in that very direction when I pondered about Life & Roses.

Me: Hey how are you? You look sad. Is everything fine. I hope nothing is serious.
Friend: nothing serious......its just a change which is sometimes undesirable, expectations unmet and some general things giving a feeling of disrespect to myself, sometimes a little guilt and sometimes too many tears in my eyes confuse me about my existence.
But don’t you worry. Nothing is serious.

Now I am not worried, its just that I could not reach to an answer as to, how a rock solid person like my friend could end up fighting tears. A person so strong, tough headed, so learnt from life not to get welled up easily and now struggling to fight her own tears. This raises a question to me. Even though, I am told that she is determined to be happy (she says determined, not destined) I still feel some loss for this. Because some loss has happened to a person, to a soul, to someone’s respect and to someone’s trust. Also I have a feeling that may be she is taking it just too seriously and she doesn’t needs to. May be its because almost everybody feels that way.

People tend to take it so normally as nothing has happened. People don’t feel bad because they are used to of changes, yes I mean the undesired changes. They do not know the words dreams and expectations for their own self, they believe that its their duty to live up to the expectations & dreams of their surroundings and they are fine spending (did you read wasting) a life for this. Now still what is itching me here is, a strong headed, self-motivated, almost self-earned person is telling me that I pray to god for peace or to rest in peace. I did see tears in her eyes!

People who are change averse face this kind of a situation. I will be wrong to say this. I guess it happens when a self-driven person who has learned this art after too much of effort is been told to hand over the steering of life in someone else’s hands. And even then, is required to be a silent observer all through the ride.

I don’t know. I am myself trying to find out all these answers for my friend. I want her to be happy as always. She is my best friend who I always relied. I want her to be a free-spirit again.

I wish her more smiles. Amen!

Intransigence

Intransigence is all what a person needs most to live. When I say ‘to live’, I mean not to be ‘undead’. One has to understand that the priority always should be ‘To have a happy oneself’. If one is not happy from inside, he/she can’t be a better sibling, a better partner, a better child, a better professional or even a better person.

Intransigence is something which never lets you feel low, feel inferior and feel forced. I know, the word may sound derogatory at times, but the word is powerful as it tells us to withstand to self beliefs and values.

Imperfections are good when one needs to know the weaknesses and realizing the imperfections becomes the strength. But before that one needs to find out the problem, sometimes unnecessary problems occur when we start underestimating ourselves under the influence of others. That time what helps is self-talk. This could be done if one practices what Lucille Ball once said,

I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.

I have always been saying in my previous posts (On, http://o3.indiatimes.com/learnwithtaurian) that, Love is a misused word. I still go by that. In a relationship, many a time love is just not enough. A relationship needs things which are beyond love. No, I am not saying ‘Devotion’, in the practical world, nobody expects that actually. It’s more of give 'n' take these days. You respect someone- you deserve respect. You love someone – you expect love and if you care- you need to be cared too.

Changes occur and few of them are inevitable. What matters here is, that one needs to appreciate the conscious/unconscious changes which life brings in, and most of the times these changes force one to change the life philosophies and if one is not able to do so, that signifies that life is loosing the purpose or may be the person starts loosing the purpose of his/her existence. This is the time one needs to be candid, plain, one needs to be Intransigent.

In short, as Janis Joplin once said, “Don’t compromise yourself. You are all you've got.”

And remember, Joseph Campbell’s words, “Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again.”

Keep Faith, Keep Smiling!